Interview with SAS Graduate | Valeria Sidorenko

Why did you choose sociology?

Do you know the feeling when you seem to have achieved great success, but it has no value to you?

By the standards of the average high school student, I was successful. I was proud of myself, and I was that “son of my mom's friend” or, in the language of our parents, “an athlete, a member of the Komsomol and just a beauty.” Nevertheless, I perceived all my personal successes more as a new pressure and new expectations that will now follow me around. I already get an excellent grade for the test not because I like this subject and I put a lot of effort into it, but because “I am an excellent student, it can't be otherwise. And how can it be otherwise, when your whole family, except for your grandfather, who was a “C” student, graduated fr om school with a medal in his teeth? That's the norm for us.

Without going into poetry, the idea is that very often I did something not out of personal interests, desires and values, but because others wanted me to. This conflict culminated in the fact that when I graduated fr om school with a gold medal, I couldn't figure out what I wanted to be, so I took the USE in six subjects at once, and decided to take physics and social studies two months before the exams. My parents wanted me to go into physics and math. Someone said that this is the age of biotechnology and digitalization, so we should look at IT. In the end, I applied to economics, innovation management, computer security, and to SAS for sociology, which (as I realize only now, after analyzing all my experience) became a kind of personal rebellion against the pressurized expectations of the people around me. I chose rebellion.

However, apart from the fact that sociology was so different from everything else I was wanted to do, I did not choose it only because of my revolutionary sentiments. Sociology as a field of study impressed me with the breadth of all the disciplines it brought together. It is the science of man in a world created by man and for man. Sociology is literally about everything, so it gave me carte blanche academically, giving me the freedom to move in any direction and to keep looking for myself.

It turns out that I turned to sociology out of spite, but when I delved deeper, I realized that it could give me exactly what I needed — a space for self-discovery. I'm definitely on the right track, because now success feels so much sweeter.

What was the path for you in the SAS?

I certainly didn't follow any tactics. I just tried to enjoy the process, whatever the end result. I chose electives that resonated with me, and if I came across a course that didn't resonate with me, I tried to find a topic within the course that would be of interest to me. In this way, choosing electives on a whim, I began to notice that the area I was most drawn to was emerging. As a result, I am pursuing minor in Cultural Studies.

SAS has definitely helped me sort myself out and start to realize what I like. At SAS, the concepts of norm and normalcy are erased. You are not told who you should be or what answer you should give, because there is no right answer, because in academia, “right” is a subjective concept, just as in life, wh ere “right” is what is right for you (within the law, of course).

I don't want to belittle anyone's experience and difficulties that someone may encounter at SAS (many of them are very objective), but speaking for myself, I definitely breathed freely here, and being in this educational environment definitely increased my awareness. Despite the fact that SAS has the image of a competitive place, I didn't want to compete, and I wasn't going to prove anything to anyone either. I'd already proved myself. Enough... SAS really gathered brilliant, super-motivated, super-proactive people in its walls, and I was afraid that they would consider me worse than myself and ostracize me (look, what a clever word I know!). But sometimes it's really cool to admit that you don't know something, the important thing is what you decide to do with it. I decided to want to learn together and learn fr om communicating with these wonderful and talented people.

In general, when you allow yourself to admit your imperfection, you open up so many new possibilities. For example, enjoying the process of learning. Sometimes it resulted in the most anti-scientific crazy essays, which could hardly have any continuation. But I like it. In short, academic hedonism is a thing! I recommend it to everyone.

Last year you studied in Portugal on an international exchange program. Did you enjoy it?

The idea of doing a master's program abroad was my number one goal when applying to SAS, so going on an exchange program was a kind of test drive to see if I could live abroad, if I would enjoy it and, most importantly, if it was really my desire and not something imposed again from the outside.

I studied at the University of Porto from February to August during my third year at SAS. There I met amazing people, kind and open, willing to help and be good friends. Even though we came from different cultures, nationalities and had different views of the world, we were much closer than one could imagine. I think it is more important today than ever to realize that we actually have more in common than we have differences. At the end of the day, we are all very much alike. An exchange program is a huge opportunity to say no to any stereotypes and cultural prejudices. An exchange program is an opportunity to see the world through other people's eyes. An exchange program is an opportunity to get closer to the people around you.

I would like to note that I received great support, including moral support, from SAS and TyumSU in general, because from an organizational point of view, preparing for an international exchange is quite a long and complicated process with a lot of documents and procedures.

In addition to broadening your cultural experience, studying abroad is a great and incredibly fast way for personal growth, because you get into a different environment and face challenges. They strongly motivate you to develop, or rather, you simply have no option not to develop. The stumbling block was the Portuguese language. That's news! Who would have thought it was spoken in Portugal?

I ended up finding myself sitting in a classroom full of Portuguese people who had no intention of communicating with me in anything other than Portuguese. In general, if you think that everyone will rush to be friends with you as soon as you cross the threshold of the class, because you are an outlandish bird who came from far away, you can leave your sweet dreams in Russia. So, to my question to the local professor: “What shall we do?” — I was only recommended to take a course in Portuguese. In the end, I persuaded the professors that I would study on my own. Thankfully, SAS taught us how to study on our own.

This is not a story about me having a wonderful opportunity to do nothing. I came on my own and chose the courses on my own. I wanted to study them, which meant I was moving towards that goal, so I consulted with my professors about what literature I should study and went to the library.

What did this experience give you? Did you make any discoveries for yourself?

It was during this period that I first had a different perspective on what success is and what success means to me. In Portugal, I got a “C” on one of my exams, on the history of the city. My grandmother said: “Lera, what a nightmare, a disgrace for a gold medalist! What will people think of you? Who will marry you... Everyone should see that you are the best, the most talented, the most beautiful...” And I listened to her and I didn't feel guilty at all, because I was proud of this trio. I went to Portugal, studied on my own for six months, came to the exam with zero understanding of what would be there, and without any help I got a well-deserved “C.” “That's how good I am! — I thought. — Wh ere should I hang it so everyone can see it?”

Success is a subjective concept. It depends on circumstances, values, inputs and many other factors, so it cannot be unified. Everyone has their own success: what is success for one person may not necessarily be considered success for others. There is nothing to talk about.

At SAS, students do internships after their 3rd year. What did you do and did you get any real experience?

I did an online internship while studying in Portugal. I was hired in the HR department of the company “Etazhi,” wh ere I participated in the organization of various custdev-research (Customer Development - research of human needs by conducting “in-depth” interviews) about the emotional state of their employees. I gave recommendations of an organizational nature, as well as on data collection strategy, questions and quantity of data.

I had a good experience. I don't know if it's a cultural thing, but often in internships you don't feel your value: it constantly seems that because of your age and education there are better workers than you, that your work isn't important, that you can't give the organization what it needs. Such self-deprecation and devaluation of one's own labor definitely doesn't play well. At the time of my internship, I was not devoid of this kind of self-deprecation. However, at “Etazhi,” I was treated as a professional whose opinion really mattered. They made it clear that my voice on issues of interest was very valuable to them. In addition to being very flattered, for the first time I looked at myself and the knowledge I possessed as a valuable resource that I could sell. By the way, a nice bonus - after the internship, I was offered an assistant position.

What is your thesis about and how did your studies at SAS help you fr om a research point of view?

SAS supports research activities. We don't have a practical orientation as such, but I think that's wh ere the value of studying at SAS lies. We get a broad theoretical background first so that we can then immerse ourselves in a particular field. Because you are in a cauldron of different scientific fields and disciplines, you gain knowledge from different fields, and in the process you start to see the interrelationships between them and transfer that understanding to your work.

In terms of my research interests, I have been fascinated by the field of urban studies for the past two years. My thesis - my most substantial research to date — is devoted to the study of human-spatial relationships. When we talk about the participants of this interaction, we tend to give the human being an active role, while the physical space is left to settle for a more passive position. There is a logic in this, because it is the human being, being the creator, who gives meaning to the space he creates, puts there his own identity, memories, personal meanings. Nevertheless, space also has the power to influence the human being and the formation of his identity. The problem is that by appealing to such ephemeral concepts as “self-determination” and “self-perception,” the influence of space on the individual is much more difficult to trace and measure. Graffiti in my work becomes an element of materializing the consequences of this relationship. I try to identify the reasons why someone decides to leave their mark on the urban surface and what they want to say.

Will you be continuing your research?

I am definitely interested in learning more about urban development. I see it as a potential for my future career, so it will be logical for me to continue my research in this field.

I have received an Erasmus Mundus scholarship (European grant program for students and teachers) and from September I will start my Master's program in Urban Studies 4CITIES. This is a humanities program and, judging by the curriculum, it comprehensively covers concepts, approaches and methods for studying and understanding the city of the past, present and future. It is also unique in that it takes place in four different countries in Europe, which means that there is an opportunity to see first-hand how different cities function. This is valuable because cities, like people, are also different. The notion of normality is missing for both. What works for some (people and cities) may not work at all for others. Our task is to see, analyze and take into account this experience in order to create spaces for people.

What is SAS for you?

For me, SAS is about freedom: on the one hand, intellectual freedom, because you have the opportunity to seek yourself in different fields, not being guided by others, but making your own path; on the other hand, mental freedom, because the shackles of normality and normalcy are removed, and the only thing that really matters is what you need.

A great example of being yourself, enjoying life, and following your dreams, even if it would seem like bullshit to most, are our professors. They are people with burning eyes, in love with what they are researching. They are so brave — they literally crossed halfway across the world to be in the center of Siberia, to pass on their knowledge and share their experiences with the people around them. It can't help but be motivating and inspiring.